First Mate's Burden
by xShirayukixRukiax
Summary: Being the first mate, he'd do everything for him...even carry his own burdens...and lay down his life for him.


Note: Among the strawhat crew, the bond I loved the most is the special bond shared between Luffy and Zoro and it's always nice to write stories about them in any genre. Anyway, this here is mostly centered on the two.

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece and the characters mentioned hereafter.

The noisy bar immediately quieted down as a small group of already matured people strode in, the captain not giving the crowd much of a glance. Immediately he sat on one stool while his crew occupied one table. He glanced at the posters hanged on the wall just in front of him before a small grin broke his lips and spoke to the bartender.

"See? I became the Pirate King," he said to the man who once served Luffy a glass of milk when Luffy was lost in the bar, somewhere in Loguetown. It had been so many years…many, many years since he first set foot on this island where it started and began for the Pirate King, Gol D. Roger.

"Indeed. Just like how Roger mentioned he would conquer the sea," the old man agreed with a soft chuckle and this time served rum to him who was already a man, aged forty seven at most. "Here."

"Thanks," he muttered and stared at the wanted posters of the original nine members of the crew. After they sailed across the New World, they started recruiting other members to join their crew. The relationship with the other members was just as close as the original but then again, there was always that special relationship among the nine.

The bartended glanced at the man and saw how the face immediately lost its brightness, as he stared at one poster in particular. His face was contorted with a mixture of pain and sadness. "I heard he was greater than Mihawk," he commented.

The present Pirate King nodded absentmindedly. "Yes. He's the greatest and the best," he agreed. His crew behind him looked at each other and they all heaved a deep, sad sigh. The new crew members always asked about them…

And they never failed to ask about the swordsman who left them selfishly as always. Luffy gripped the bottle tightly but not putting pressure into the bottle of sake so as not to break it. He controlled himself and when finally calmed, he raised the bottle in the air as memories flowed back.

"Kanpai!"

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Their first meeting was unusual, as always the case with Luffy when meeting nakama. From there, he had invited Zoro to join his crew – a crew composed of only him. Despite that, despite Zoro's initial refusal of the offer, he still found himself nodding his head in agreement and they became the first two of the StrawHat Pirates. Along their journey, they have met some – Nami, Usopp, Sanji…and then they met the blue-haired princess, Vivi before Chopper. They helped the princess save her country from the hands of a Shichibukai where Luffy almost died if not for Robin who would later on join their small group.

They traveled far and wide. They all shared the greatest moments and amidst all that, there was that special bond between the captain and the first mate. Though not really an official right hand, Zoro was constantly viewed upon as the next in-command on certain occasions where Luffy was not around.

Eventually, he became Luffy's steadfast support, silently trusting him to be always by his side. And the bond between the two grew stronger each passing day. Of course, Luffy was also close to his other crew members but his relationship with Zoro was somehow different, it was grounded on mutual respect, honor and loyalty on each other's strength and capability. And not to mention promises.

Zoro had soon forgotten his own dream for Luffy's sake enough to even sacrifice himself in front of Kuma if only to allow the raven-haired boy to achieve his goal. He had discarded his objective, his blade now more for protecting his nakama, especially his captain, rather than achieving his dreams. The promise with Kuina came second already.

And because of Luffy, Zoro was not only introduced into the world of piracy but was also introduced into the feeling of swallowing one's pride for the sake of another. He did that when he bowed down his head in front of Mihawk and asked that he trained under him. Not for himself anymore but for his captain.

And thus two years later, they all met once more on the place where they were cruelly and utterly defeated by Kizaru and separated by Kuma. The instant they met, Zoro knew his captain had changed. Sure he had grown a lot stronger since he was trained by Rayleigh but Zoro knew that the death of Ace had somehow changed Luffy inside.

He was not as lively as he was before and he became driven with hate for the marines that Zoro found it rather troubling. Even when fighting marines, Zoro had often times seen a glint of cruelty that was never there before, as if fighting them would avenge his brother's death.

And when alone, Luffy would speak to him and admit what he feared most.

"I was weak before," he slowly said, his eyes on the vast sea as captain and first mate stood on the prow of the ship in solitude. "Ace…he would not have died," he choked, still unable to accept despite the two years that he had really been gone.

Zoro would only lend his ears but does not speak, his presence an enough comfort for the grieving man. "I thought I was already strong enough…"

Zoro sighed. This change around his captain often became the contention of arguments among the crew. Though they all shared the same sadness, they could not quite understand why Luffy had to change so much, the brightness in his eyes replaced with nothing but total blankness. And because of that change, the crew had been put on life and death situations a couple of times already. It's not like they were complaining, but somehow, Luffy had started losing focus on his true goal.

That fact was once uttered by Usopp and Nami, perhaps from confusion and annoyance and grief, stated that she might have followed the wrong person after all. It was because of those countless situations where they almost died that she often argued with Luffy, demanding why he was dragging them to a death march. And while before, Luffy would really just ignore Nami and just allowed her to do what she wanted, this time, it was different.

He would fight back, imposing his position as a captain which shocked the entire crew save for one. There was no longer harmony among the crew, the members often wary of Luffy when he's around and that did not escape his notice. But he had a greater goal and they don't have to even realize it.

But when he thought, they were all clueless as to why he's doing those, he was mistaken about one. His first mate who remained by his side and stood by him.

"They hated me now, don't they?" he asked bitterly.

"Is that how you see it?" Zoro asked instead and leaned on the mast. It was full moon that time.

"Somehow."

A pregnant pause followed before the first mate finally spoke. "Luffy, you know I will always stand by your side," he started, his eyes closed. Luffy glanced at him with a worried look. Does Zoro hate him too? Because while he can still deal with the other's growing aloofness towards him which was his fault, he could not even bare to think that Zoro would also. He's the only one giving him strength. "There is no question about that. But you also have to understand that it's not just me but them also."

Luffy glanced away, guiltily. He had a feeling Zoro knew what he had wanted all along the moment they have stepped foot on the New World. "Don't ruin this group simply because of that thirst to avenge Ace's death."

The last words made him suddenly snap, his arms immediately reaching for him and slammed him on the mast just behind. Yet Zoro did not fight back and allowed Luffy to do what he wanted.

"Don't you dare – "

"Your inability to accept the fact that Ace died to protect you and your dream is what's ruining you right now," Zoro stated calmly. "The moment you decided to avenge him, you have started to lose yourself."

His eyes flashed raw anger that Zoro had never seen directed to any of his nakama. "It's two years already! You should get over it by now!"

"Damn you!" Luffy cursed suddenly and slammed his fist on Zoro's face. Zoro made a small sound but other than that, he just allowed himself to be pummeled by the fueling captain. The noise had already attracted the attention of the others as they rushed outside to check on it only to stop in shock when Luffy stood with bloody hands while Zoro lay on the floor, his eyes just simply staring above, at the dark sky.

"No…" Nami gasped as she immediately ran towards Zoro, her eyes glaring at the captain who was now bowing his head while holding his hat. "Zoro."

The swordsman simply raised his hand to quiet her, telling her he is doing fine. He turned to Luffy. "Does that satisfy you or do you need to vent more?"

"What the hell happened here?" Sanji decided to butt in.

Zoro finally sat up, his hand wiping the blood from his face while Nami tried to support him. "Nothing. Just a sparring."

Of course they knew he was lying. Hell, Zoro was bad at lying. But they chose to keep quiet, understanding that there was more to the scene that the two wished to keep to themselves. He stood up and swayed a little, smirking inwardly at the thought that he finally got to taste a little of his Gear Second in just a few minutes. He turned to Nami. "I'll be fine."

"But…"

When he ignored her again, Nami could not take it anymore and cried furiously. She turned to Luffy. "What has happened to you Luffy?" she demanded heatedly. "You have been dragging us to meaningless troubles these past few weeks! And now you also have to hurt the person who still chose to stay by your side? How could you be so cruel this time?"

Luffy turned to Nami and Zoro saw the shift of expressions. There was confusion there, the rage suddenly gone. "Nami…"

"I've had it! I'm leaving this ship!" she stalked off in anger, her bold statement shocking the others.

"O-Oi," Usopp hurried to her.

"I can't take this atmosphere anymore. This isn't the ship I used to sail on," she said without looking back before entering her cabin. The others turned to Luffy but he simply had his back on them.

"L-Luffy…y-you have to stop her," Chopper cried out.

"Let her leave if she wished to," he answered coldly. Zoro shook his head and decided to follow the hot-tempered woman. He glanced at his captain and sighed.

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He found her furiously packing a few clothes, her hands wiping her tears from time to time. Zoro simply leaned on the wall and watched her quietly. Finally finding the words to say, Nami turned to him. "You will not stop me."

He did not respond.

"I can't take it anymore," she cried weakly and sat on the bed, her shoulders shaking. "Why do you continue standing by his side Zoro? Why do you continue supporting his decisions so blindly?"

"Didn't we all do that at one point?" he asked instead, not minding if his face felt sore from the heavy punches.

"Yes but…he has changed. He…was not the Luffy we all know," Nami argued. "He was even willing to hurt a nakama. Let's all leave this ship for a while, Zoro. Then we come back."

Zoro shook his head. "That's not how things are done, Nami. That's a coward's way," he stated. "If we all feel tired about this, it is just the same as giving him up."

Name covered her face with both hands and cried even more, refusing to acknowledge the hidden message behind it. Zoro could really be an idiot.

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When his crew left him there, Luffy stared upwards, tears falling down. It appalled him to realize a while ago that he had hurt his nakama. Inside, he felt suddenly rotten. He was known for his ferocity in protecting his nakama yet earlier, in fit of rage, Luffy had hurt the one thing he tried to protect the moment Robin was taken from them. Nakama. And it was Zoro no less.

He glanced up when there was a sound only to find them all there, a small pack with them. He felt bitter inside. It was his own doing. And now he came to realize what Zoro had been trying to say earlier before he mentioned the thing about Ace.

"We…can't just let Nami leave alone," Usopp declared awkwardly.

Luffy simply nodded although his inside is screaming to stop them. But Luffy could not find the words to say at the moment. He was ashamed for his actions the past few weeks. He wanted to stop them but he does not know what to really say

"No one is leaving."

It was the firm voice of the swordsman which caught everyone's attention as he stood nearby, his arms crossed together. His face was serious, his features stern. "No one will leave this ship. Name decided to stay."

"But – "

Zoro cut them off with an icy glare before he turned to Luffy who was speechless. "Luffy, like I have said earlier, it's not just supposed to be me. You have them too."

And he left them there to ponder on what was said. Later, when everyone was on bed, the rest of the crew realized one thing. They now understood why Zoro remained by Luffy's side.

He became Luffy's voice when the captain does not know what to say at all. And his role of being the first mate had been given another meaning. That incident was the trigger to which things started to return to normal. It was awkward at first, but little by little, the whole crew started to act like how they were supposed to be. All because Zoro stood firm and maintained the group, trying to keep the ties together and not letting any of it go.

Years passed and those years saw the struggle of the StrawHat pirates against other forces, and years saw how the bond between the captain and first mate grew even stronger than before. Already twenty-eight, the crew immediately and suddenly took detour from the sojourn and returned back to Arabasta to save Vivi from the hands of the marines who already found out her affiliation with them. It was a tearful reunion and Vivi joined the crew, having nothing left of her kingdom. Her father and the loyal guards, Chaka and Pell, and even Kohza were all gone…

What happened to Arabasta was close to what happened to Ohara where the island was almost if not all wiped out. The inhabitants died, protecting her highness, not willing to give her up to the marines. After all, it was because of her that Arabasta was saved from Crocodile. It was because she met those good pirates.

A few years more and Vivi melted the remaining ice that froze Luffy's heart upon his brother's death. Eventually, she became his wife as they traveled more on many seas, as they fought their enemies giving them chase. However, while Vivi became the most important woman for Luffy, though Nami and Robin were just as important, Zoro was still Luffy's most important. He knew that without Zoro, he was nothing. Suddenly, it occurred to Luffy that every step of the way, he had always needed Zoro.

Then, when they were a bit older, tragedy struck once more. They had an encounter with admirals and Shicibukai. It was then that she was taken away, died while fighting alongside Nami who became Zoro's wife by the way.

It happened in a split second when upon Vivi's attempt to protect Chopper nearby, a piercing light ran straight through her heart, momentarily freezing every Straw Hat member as they stared at her in open shock. Then Luffy roared.

"VIVI!"

Zoro's Wado left his mouth as he stared at his captain running to Vivi who was now being tended immediately by Chopper. He closed his eyes before using Wado once more, this time his focus was on the one responsible for hurting Vivi. The fight this time wasn't like how it was in Shabaondy where Zoro was helpless against Kizaru.

This time, he fought at par, at an even greater strength than Kizaru had known. And in the end, he emerged victorious and Luffy ordered to retreat. Tending to Vivi was more important than fighting them. But even Chopper's medical knowledge did not save Vivi from death and the Thousand Sunny was filled with eerie silence for the following days, as the captain mourned and cried for his loss in the hands of the marines, while the others cried as well except one.

Zoro simply stared at the horizon. He had been on this spot for the past couple of days while they all cried for Vivi. He did not show any emotions, so much that his nakama started to believe that he was an unfeeling human being with a heart made of stone already in the years of being the steadfast support of the group.

Her death did not even elicit a single tear from him – him who was probably the closest to her aside from her husband. Everyone expected that he would cry with them.

But no.

He simply stood beside his captain with a stony expression on his already stern features. Beside him wailed his captain, crying for yet another loss, inwardly blaming himself once again for being unable to protect his wife. Throughout all of those ordeal, Zoro was just standing as the quiet support to his captain, more so than to his wife. It was also on that time, while they were mourning for her, that Mihawk appeared from nowhere. It was him who challenged Zoro and not the other way around.

The swordsman accepted and the two found a nearby island. Zoro would not permit a fight within Thousand Sunny, especially while Vivi was still being mourned by the captain.

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Two blades crashed as both swordsmen held his ground, not willing to give up the fight, not willing to lose. Spectators watched with held breath, each vying for his bet to win. One crew stood close to each other, their eyes full of faith and hope and worry. After all, the two fighters were on stalemate for almost two hours already, both fairly wounded.

It was the fight that Zoro had dreamed about, the fight he had always wanted to make his childhood friend proud from where she was watching above. After a few years, the master and apprentice met. It was ironic to call their relationship that but such was the truth for when Zoro chose to bow down his head in front of the strongest swordsman, he became the apprentice and Mihawk the master.

And the master who had taught what he knew to the youngster spoke in a clipped tone, his voice hinted disappointment. "Your swords are heavy," he commented.

The one known as the pirate hunter, first mate to the Straw Hat Luffy maintained an impassive face, his eyes meeting that of the hawk-eyed. Sparks were created as both swords collided once more. "It had always been such," Zoro answered.

The crew listened and Nami had to bite her lip, wanting to prevent her own tears from falling down. Years of traveling with the swordsman and still, they don't know about why he wanted to defeat the greatest swordsman. They never knew of Zoro's past except maybe for one – their captain who should have been here with them all.

"It's heavier now," Mihawk said and stood up, his blade pointed on the ground as he studied the man whom he came to respect, whom he knew would and might defeat him one day. "Heavier than before…tell me, what more burdens do you carry?"

"It's none of your concerns," Zoro answered in a dismal tone as he clutched Wado between his teeth, Sandai and Shusui on both hands. He was gripping both swords so tight.

"True," Mihawk conceded then raised his blade once more, his stance was that of a man ready to attack once more. "But you see Roronoa, you could have won easily if you discard those burdens and focus on what you truly aimed."

Zoro parried the attack without another word, his shoulder getting cut making him step back three times as Mihawk stared at him.

"You disappoint me," he finally said. "What happened to that dream of becoming the Greatest Swordsman if you couldn't even defeat me now, Roronoa?" he asked, his eyes catching sight of the Red Haired pirates quietly watching with interest. At the same time, they stood as guards on the island, not allowing even the marines to interfere with the fight and with Luffy's mourning.

Zoro raised his head, his eyes full of resolve but it was for something different. "I will defeat you," he said with conviction.

"Only if you discard the burden which isn't yours to carry alone," he scoffed at him. "The blades are crying for their master's inability to trust them."

The remark made his eyes widen in surprise as he stared at Mihawk. The latter continued in a cold voice. "Your guilt had dulled your blades and you have ignored their cries long enough as you struggled to get stronger.

"Shut up," Zoro growled.

"It's true, you became a swordsman who does not know what to do anymore. A stray swordsman."

Due to confusion and rising anger, Zoro barely managed to dodge another hit and he was sent flying to his own nakama.

"Zoro!" Nami cried. Chopper knelt down to check on his injuries but Zoro waved him off.

"I'm fine Chopper," he said and forced himself to stand up.

"What's bothering you Zoro? You can defeat that man now, you have become stronger, right?" Nami held onto his arm, crying. "Why are you allowing him to land a hit on you?"

"It's not like he is allowing me actually," Mihawk approached with a deadly look on his eyes. "It's because his mind is not made up."

Zoro stood up, squeezed Nami's shoulder to assure her he'd be fine then walked towards Mihawk. The hawk-eyed watched as he strode slowly. "Fighting for the man you vowed to make the Pirate King, that was what became of my dream," he stated honestly. Then his eyes sharpened. "However, I did not abandon my dream of defeating you."

And once more, the two clashed. In the end, it was Zoro's victory. Even when everyone had left, Zoro stood there, even when Shanks took Mihawk's defeated form, he remained there as the rain started to flow. He stood there till night.

And the night saw two figures standing under the rain. The younger one gave a small pat. "I always trusted in you."

Zoro grunted. "I know."

"I'm sorry I wasn't here to watch you fight," Luffy stated solemnly, making Zoro hit him in the head lightly. It was enough to say he understood. They stood there a little longer, talking about how everything had changed so much since Shabaondy. Then Luffy turned to him once more, his face serious. "It's heavy…"

This line reminded them both about that fight Luffy had with Usopp. And while the others almost went against Luffy's orders, it was only Zoro who never spoke and simply supported Luffy. And when Luffy finally spoke those words long ago, it was Zoro who told him to endure it because it was a captain's burden. Thinking back, Luffy realized that Zoro had indeed been always by his side.

"Then lighten that burden by letting it all out," Zoro advised. "Just remember, you still got us."

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Few years more before that day when finally, the steadfast support that had always been quietly there went away. It was yet another run into with the marines, with only Aka Inu left from the old school. They fought ferociously, protecting each other, not allowing another one to die in the hands of the marines.

He waited for so many years to finally meet the man who killed his brother and the chance had finally presented itself as Luffy faced Aka Inu who was smirking at him. The face alone was enough to bring out the rage that had been dormant for some time. The rest of the crew had already stood and watched, their fights already finished. Name cast her husband a worried look when Zoro stood from the rest of them, his face blank.

"Luffy!" Chopper cried when Luffy was thrown to their direction. But he only stood up, wiped his blood and charged once more.

"Do not interfere! This is my fight! I have waited for this for so long," Luffy commanded tersely as he charged with fury and his anger made him lose his focus. And once again, they had a glimpse of the other side of Luffy as he dealt Aka Inu some deadly attacks while receiving some as well. Stepping back, Luffy fell on his knees as he felt exhausted. But that split second of taking a rest gave Aka Inu the upper hand and for the first time in so many years, Luffy saw what happened to Ace. The fact that he remembered more made him numb instantly, unable to move.

"Luffy!" he could hear everyone shouting his name but he only felt frozen on the spot, that even which took place in the Marine Headquarters playing back in his mind.

"No!"

The single cry from Nami snapped him back to his senses only to realize that he had not been replaying it in his mind but it happened again. This time, it was Zoro.

"Z-Zoro…?" he asked, unsure if it was real.

"Tch. I told you before that you would lose yourself by giving in to that anger," he stated darkly, breathing hard.

"Just like last time, eh?" Aka Inu mocked as he took his burning hands off Zoro and was to attack once more. This time, Zoro was prepared and used haki to block the devil fruit ability before delivering the final blow which took Aka Inu by surprise.

"Zoro!"

"Oi, marimo!"

"Zoro!"

The two ignored the shouts as Zoro fell forward, Luffy catching him just like how it happened with Ace. Then that fear arose inside him.

"No. Don't do this to me," Luffy cried. "You couldn't…you would not…"

"Heh, guess I wouldn't be able to see you reach the top, eh Luffy?" Zoro muttered regrettably. He wondered if Ace regretted the same.

"You…! Don't die on me, now," Luffy demanded against the tears. "We made a promise that we will all sail together to find everyone's dream."

Zoro smirked. "Heh."

"Zoro…no…" Nami cried and knelt down.

"Guess, death would be too pleased this time," he snorted then his eyes hardened. "I couldn't bare you to stain that innocent pair of hands with his blood so I have to finish it for you. It's fun serving you…captain."

Luffy's eyes widened. That was Zoro's thoughts? His hands trembled and stared down at him. "Chopper! Hurry up! We can't lose him!" he cried out in despair.

Zoro chortled, making his wound open more. "You must always remember that you're the captain…"

Luffy wondered why Zoro had not continued and he stared in horror upon realizing that Zoro was already dead. Nami keened, her head on his chest. Chopper and Usopp huddled together. Sanji looked away. Robin bowed her head, allowing the tears to fall silently.

What Zoro had been telling him before when they were younger, his silent message was for Luffy to trust in his crew mate, to actually share his burdens with them. And even the crew realized it after he was gone. Because Luffy had been acting differently before, Zoro had to take all the burden his captain was carrying.

He had to remain firm while Luffy was rash, while the rest were starting to doubt following him. He had to harden his heart, to remain emotionless, to remain strong while Luffy allowed himself to be weak, to mourn for Vivi and Ace. He had to be the voice for Luffy when the latter does not know how to reach out for his crew anymore. He tucked his own grief for the death of a nakama, of Luffy's wife, if only to remain stronger than the rest so that the group would not crumble. He allowed Luffy to have his moments of weaknesses, he allowed him to cry and mourn while he denied himself that thus making the pain heavier.

And eventually, Zoro had to stain his hands once more if only to let Luffy retain the innocence he always had – of not killing the person who killed his brother. Twice, Zoro was the one who shouldered Luffy's burden and vengeance in order to allow Luffy to live without having to regret killing anyone because he knew that once it was settled, Luffy might break down at the mere thought of killing someone when in fact his only goal was to have an adventure while protecting his nakama.

He made it his own burden to help Luffy up because according to his conversation with Sanji once, when they were drinking. _It is my duty as the warrior of this crew._ He never even claimed to be the right-hand man no matter how unofficial it was. For Zoro, because he was a warrior that needed to protect the future king.

Sanji lit his smoke and looked up. No wonder Mihawk said his swords had become heavier and his blades were crying for their master…

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Nearly another few more years, one by one went away. That time, he had already become the pirate king. Though happy, a part of Luffy would forever wish to see his beloved wife, his brother and Zoro.

He was smiling ruefully as he stared at the aged wanted poster, his body too tired to move. It was then when he saw a number of figures surrounding him. And his face split into a wide grin when he spotted a certain green-haired among the eight members. Luffy wasn't sure if he was having illusions or not at all but he was happy to finally see him after so many long, long years of waiting.

Before he was about to dash towards the scowling swordsman, he looked back to see his corporeal body resting peacefully and he knew he was finally reunited.

"Zoro!" he cried and ran to him while the man stepped back, making him trip instead.

"What the – "

"I've missed you," Luffy continued while trying to get a hold of him as the others laughed with amusement. After all, who would blame Luffy for his childish behavior towards the only person who understood him the most? Zoro was the first one to go in their crew yet he was undeniably and undoubtedly the most important. The crew knew that and they knew why. It was because there was always that implicit trust that made their bond special.

"Get off me, you monkey!" Zoro growled before yanking away from Luffy only to stand a few feet from him and appraised him carefully. It surprised Luffy that they all looked younger. "Tch, you finally arrived, Pirate King? You're at death's door and we came to fetch you."

Luffy beamed. There is no need for words between them. He knew Zoro is just as happy as he is. "Yeah and thanks. Good to see you…"

Zoro nodded and jerked his thumb towards a white door. And Luffy jumped up in glee and dashed towards Ace and Vivi who were both laughing as he cried out. His eyes caught sight of Zoro and he mouthed his thanks to which the former King of Swordsmen answered with a snort.

Sanji decided to stand beside Zoro and spoke. "Still the First Mate even in the afterlife eh?" he mused.

"Shut up."

"You and him sure carried a lot on your shoulders when alive…yet it just showed how much you were willing to take all of it if possible," Nami commented too. "Luffy had always been lucky and he was real sad when you went. He never got over that sadness. I thought you should know that."

"Heh."

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honestly, I've written this out of boredom so I apologize if it sounded bad and also, sorry if the characters are somewhat OOC. Anyway, thanks for reading.


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